Shadows every day

It's so difficult for me to not be totally discouraged when my meds fail me. I had to get out my wheelchair yesterday for the first time in almost a year. My "miracle drug" has started working less and less recently. Friday night Clarence and I got ready and went out to the club and as soon as I got there, I passed out. My Chris sat outside with me and told me funny stories trying to cheer me up and distract me from the fact that I could barely sit up. Someone had to go get Clarence for me, and we left about 20 minutes after getting there. I had to be carried to the car, and I was in and out of consciousness for about 2 hours after that...even laying down!! (this is practically unheard of) I always feel like such a burden on Clarence when I'm like that. It's been a while since he's had to deal with it, but I know it frustrates him to not ever be able to get out of the house and have fun when I'm sick.

Yesterday I was supposed to go into work, but I still couldn't walk, so Lucinda and Clarence dragged my wheelchair out and took me to the butterfly exhibit at the museum of natural history that's right around the corner from my house. It was lovely, actually. Yesterday was a perfect day. After the museum, they took me on a picnic out to this park on the edge of town, where we saw some friends of ours (and my assistant from work!) LARPing. It was horribly amusing to witness, actually. Seeing a group of grown men walk out of the woods towards you dressed in armor, pirate outfits (complete with eyepatch), and assorted other geek-gear is extremely amusing. My assistant extremely embarrassed that I had seen him in his bright blue leather armor.

Clarence and Lucinda decided to go to Jacksonville last night to a couple of clubs there. I had to do some convincing to get Clarence to go, as he's always loathe to leave me when I'm sick (or any time, actually), but I had my friends come over and play scrabble with me and watch the Primaries, so it was ok.

I don't know, I'm glad I have friends who help me when my body is stupid, but it is really frustrating to not be able to walk to go to the bathroom, or get up whenever I want to get a drink.

I'm so glad I have Clarence though.